Confronting the Fear of Rejection

by Jun 13, 2024Uncategorized

Ouch! That hurt!

If that is not what you have been tempted to say when you have shared the gospel, either you have not shared it enough or you are not being honest with yourself. Sooner or later, you will face those who plainly reject your message regardless of how lovingly it is expressed.

What do you do at those times so that a hard experience does not become your last one – a decision to never again speak to someone about the Lord.

Four suggestions will help you confront the fear of rejection instead of running from it.  You can thus overcome the fear  of rejection instead of letting it overcome you.

1. Expect what is promised to happen.

Jesus never said that rejection is something that might happen. Instead, He promised that it is something that will happen.

Jesus said in John 15:19, “If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.

The reason is that the truth is always what we need to hear, but it is not necessarily something we want to hear.  When we tell people that we are sinners who deserve eternal separation from God that can cut quite deeply into our conscience. If as an unbeliever I reject the message, I might also reject the one who shared it with me.

By expecting it to happen, it removes the element of surprise when it occurs. Gratefully there will be those who are pleased that you cared enough to speak to them, but there will also be those who make it obvious that they wish you hadn’t. Do not go forth with the attitude that they will not receive what you have to tell them, but do not be surprised if they don’t.

2. Faithfulness to God demands that you tell people what they need to hear, not necessarily what they want to hear.

When you evangelize you are speaking on behalf of an Almighty God. Part of confronting your fear is realizing our first and foremost responsibility is not to someone below but to the One above. 

Paul the apostle said in Galatians 1:10, “For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be as bondservant of Christ.” He then continued with those penetrating words, “But I make known to you, brethren, that the gospel which was preached by me is not according to man.”

The message we give to others is first and foremost the message He gave to us. It is not a message a friend told you to share but a message your Savior told you to share.  Your ultimate accountability is always to Him not to them. That is why our first concern has to be, “Would He be pleased with the words that come from my mouth?” It is not, “Will they be pleased?”

3. It is a proven fact that many get mad before they get saved.

The reason is quite simple. They go to their place of residence and begin to think and rethink all that was said. They then sometimes ask, “Why did I get so mad?”  and conclude, ”Because he (the one who spoke to you) is right. I am not as perfect as I claim to be.”

Where does that conviction come from and why does it occur? Speaking of the ministry of the Holy Spirit, Christ said in John 16:8, “And when He has come, He will convict the world of sin, and of righteous, and of judgment.

That is why a believer’s demeanor is so important. If they become upset, God can use our confidence in what we are saying and our calmness in how we say it to convict them.

But that is what also helps in overcoming the fear of rejection. It is realizing that this might be the step that preceded them coming to Christ.

4. Our prayer for them and us must be more frequent than ever.

When we leave their presence our prayers on their behalf are crucial. Our talking to them for the moment may be done, our talking to God about them needs to be more earnest and regular than ever. We must pray again that God will convict us of sin, righteousness, and judgment.

But we dare not stop there. When confronted with the fear of rejection, we must pray what the disciples prayed. They said in Acts 4:29, “Now, Lord, look on their threats, and grant to your servants that with all boldness they may speak your word.” We must pray for them, but we must also pray for ourselves. Our prayer needs to be that God will give us the kind of boldness that overcomes fear instead of allowing Satan to use fear to overcome boldness.

Conclusion

These four simple suggestions will have a dynamic effect. They will assure you that regardless of their response, your next experience will not be your last one.