Few things bother a non-Christian more than when a believer’s lips say one thing and his life says another. Witnessing to an unbeliever who has observed such a contradiction can be difficult. In essence they are asking:

 “Why do you talk to me about the way I live when you ought to be talking to your fellow believer about the way he lives?”
“Case closed. I live a better life without Christ or church than that believer has lived.”
“The difference between me and that fellow in your church is that I don’t claim to be someone I am not. He has proven that he is a bigger phony than I am.”

So how do you respond? Bearing several principles in mind can determine if that hypocritical believer becomes a barrier or a bridge to sharing the gospel.

1. Don’t deny what has been proven.

Denying proven facts merely establishes you as someone who refuses to face reality. Your defensiveness could put up such a barrier that the unbeliever sees no need to talk any further.

2. Remember – the unbeliever is watching your actions not just listening to your words.

Annoyance with what someone mentions is not always expressed in words. Sometimes, it is seen in your actions. A disgruntled look, a heavy sigh, a frown or a downward glance says loudly and clearly, “Why did you have to bring that up?” On the other hand, steady eye contact, a listening ear, a nod at the right place, tells them, “I understand why you feel the way you do and there is some validity in what you are saying.”

3. Don’t get defensive.

It is possible to admit (instead of deny) what has happened but then immediately get defensive. Comments are made such as, “I am sure he wishes he had not done that,” “That is not the normal way he has lived.” “I am sure he will never let that happen again.” “I wonder how many have done the same thing.”

Sinful behavior on the part of a church leader is wrong – period! Getting defensive could downplay in some people what you would criticize in others.

4. Admit your own weaknesses and vulnerability.

There are few places in evangelism that “I” instead of “they” is not helpful. “I want to be careful that what annoys me in others I don’t eventually do myself.” That way you establish yourself as a person who, if you are not careful, could do the same thing they have observed in a fallen church leader. Admit to them that you are as prone to sin as anyone else is and through your own example you encourage them to be like-minded.

I often refer them to Galatians 6:1. We are told, “Brethren, if any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted.”

Seeing your willingness to admit that you could have fallen in the same way others have, encourages them to look at their own sin instead of merely the sin of others.

5. Use what has happened as a bridge to present the gospel.

This is the most critical part of your conversation. Take what they have observed and use it to present the gospel.

Circumstances and conversations vary so much. As you are talking, whisper a prayer for God to give you wisdom as to how you might present the gospel. Philippians 4:6 is as true here as it is anywhere else. “…but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.”

Here are a few examples of what I have found effective:

“I am so grateful that what we do, although it is wrong, does not have to keep us out of heaven. May I show you the reason why from the Bible?”

“Has anyone ever shown you from the Bible how Jesus responded to someone who did something similar?”  Then take them to John 8:1-11.

“I think it is so important that we do not focus so much on what Christians have or have not done that we miss the most important thing that Christ did for us. Can I explain what I mean by that?”

Comments like these provide a bridge from talking about what they have seen those who call themselves Christians do to something far more important — what Christ did on a cross for everybody everywhere.

Conclusion

Witnessing to those who struggle as they observe fallen church leaders (as regretful as that is) does not have to be an obstacle. It can be an opportunity – not a barrier but a bridge. Handling such a conversation with truth and grace can provide a door that allows you to point them to the One who died for sinners – everyone everywhere.